Why "Fair" Could Be a Legal Time Bomb for Your Kids

Sandy Emerson
May 3
2 min read

We all want to be fair. When parents sit down to draft a Will or a Trust, the instinct is almost always the same: "I love my children equally, so I’ll name them all as Co-Executors." It feels like the ultimate gesture of impartiality. In reality, it is often the final blow to a family’s peace.

By naming siblings as Co-Executors (or Co-Trustees), you aren't just giving them a job—you are forcing grieving rivals into a high-stakes business partnership where unanimous consensus is the only way forward.

The Architecture of Gridlock

In Illinois, Co-Executors are "jointly and severally" responsible. This means:

The Signature Trap: Every deed, tax return, and bank withdrawal requires every sibling's signature.
The Veto Power: If three siblings want to sell the family home and one wants to keep it "for sentimental reasons," the asset is effectively frozen.
Administrative Paralysis: The estate cannot move faster than the slowest (or most stubborn) person involved.

From Grief to Litigation

When you combine the raw emotions of loss with the power to block a sibling's inheritance, you create a breeding ground for resentment. What starts as a disagreement over a listing price quickly spirals into permanent estrangement.

If they can’t agree, the only "tie-breaker" is a judge. At that point, the "fair" inheritance you left behind begins to leak out of the family bank account and into the pockets of probate attorneys.

Better Ways to Be Fair

True fairness isn't about giving everyone a steering wheel; it’s about ensuring the car actually reaches the destination. To protect your legacy, consider these alternatives:

The Successor Strategy: Name your most administratively capable child as the primary Executor, with the others listed as "Successors" only if the first is unable to serve.
The Professional Fiduciary: If there is already tension in the family, hire a neutral third party (like a bank or a professional trustee). It costs a fee, but it’s cheaper than a lawsuit.
The Majority Rule Clause: If you must name three or more, ensure your legal documents allow for majority rule rather than unanimous consent.

The Bottom Line: An estate is a business, not a family meeting. Don't let your desire to be "equal" destroy the family you spent a lifetime building.